George Orwell got it slightly wrong. Big Brother is not a totalitarian political dictator; he’s the tech nerd trying to sell you more shit you don’t really need.
We know Facebook and Google make their money selling data about us. There’s billions in knowing who you are, who you know, what you do, and where you go.
But they also:
- listen in on our conversations
- connect to our phone’s camera and microphone
- keep a record of our calls
- track our location — whether we want them to or not.
This week I found out, Amazon could be the worst. They have thousands of employees listening in on what we say to Alexa. The last two doctors I went to had Alexa, so we could listen to music while they shot shit in my knees.
I don’t really care if Amazon knows about my arthritis, but do we really want Amazon knowing how our prostate exam went or whether we were “fully cleaned out” for the colonoscopy?
Ladies, would you like a recording of your latest pelvic exam? Me neither. But I bet there’s a market out there for it…
Most of the data on the internet is stored on Amazon through its Amazon Web Services.
That service alone could make $18 billion this year.
As a whole, Amazon is closing in on being a $1 trillion company. That’s right, put your pinky to the corner of your mouth and say it with me: “One Trillion Dollars.”
Amazon could earn more than $10 billion in profits this year.
Let’s see, access to most of the data and web traffic information on the internet, tracking our purchases and location… Face it when they say “You may also like…” that’s bullshit. They already know what we “really like.”
Pretty soon that message is going to be:
“I can’t get that grill for you, Kieran. Meat is murder. Aren’t you fat enough? Here, select from these fresh vegetables instead.”
Now they have $10 billion to play with… Jeff Bezos should be voted most likely to become the new Bond Villian:
Look at this dude. He went from harmless retail nerd to jacked supervillian. Did he use up all the testosterone and steroids in Seattle?
I’ve been there and nobody else in that town seems to give a shit about muscles. They are too busy eating organic fruit (brought to you by my brother the plantation owner)
Good thing Bezos has mostly been focused on dumping his wife and fucking his girlfriend. We have got to keep this potential monster distracted, before he turns his super computers on us.
Amazon has been experimenting with drones, and working out robots that can rove the sidewalk to drop off our “packages.” That shit is not working so far, but you know they are going to figure it out sooner or later.
Then they will be on your phone, in your house, flying over your backyard and roving the streets with cameras and recordings…
Put that together with Artificial Intelligence and DNA studies and pretty soon:
- The media will get even better “at controlling the messages” we see based on who we are and who we know.
- The police will have tracking data to find anyone at any time.
- The FBI will use “predicitive data” on who is likely to commit crimes.
- Your insurance company will want a DNA review before setting it’s price.
- And The Bear will want to know exactly how many beers I consumed at the Third World Club last Tuesday.
It’s not going to be a Big Brother or a Brave New World — it’s going to be Facebook, Google, and Amazon data centers controlling every aspect of your life.
Humans will be reduced to little bits flipping electrons on chips, and anybody will be able to know anything about us — if “The Price Is Right.”
Yep, it will be a god damn game show of personal information splayed out for personal pleasure and corporate profits.
That Ladies and Gentlemen is the new Orwellian Vision for the 21st Century.
Categories: Bad Tech
I kind of feel bad for the poor Amazon bastard who gets stuck hearing customers beating off to porn.
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I’m sure there is a market for that too.