I hate the health care system just for treating me like a child, but this week my writer friend Sean is really fucked — or whatever anglo-saxon swear word you can wrap around having a rock stuck in your urethra.

He told the story much better than I ever could here: https://thelandmanatee.com/2019/12/23/the-u-s-healthcare-system-sucks/

Sean Layton prior to his Kidney Stone.

But I’ll add my own giant fuck-you to the US system that leaves us in the lurch at almost every turn. Today it will be Sean’s turn to go under the knife. As he passes out, he has to figure out how to pay an $8000 deductible.

Last year, I did the most selfish GoFundMe ever when all the hopeless alcohlics I know in Tucson donated to a Fermentor for Larry.  Even that bullshit fundraiser struggled, until the women of the mixed doubles teams got involved and in an hour Larry had “the precious.”

I’m sure there are tons of better things to do with all the little electrons running over the silicon chips in your bank’s computer that show the number of digits in your account.  But this will be quick and painless for you, and it might help Sean scream just a little less when they pull the kidney stone out of his privates.

If you want to join the fun, add to the Go Fund Me for Sean.

And you can check out his blog and writings here.

Update: Dec. 30, 2019

Once the Bear saw the GoFundMe campaign, she had tons of corrections and advice. I sort of do marketing for a living, but she’s a god damn one-woman focus group.

“You gotta change the title,” she said with one eye open as she as she laid in bed.  “Kidney stones pass on their own, no one is going to donate to that. No one is going to read past that first sentence.

“It’s gotta say something like ‘health crisis’ or ‘crushing medical bills’ so people might care.”

Yes, yes.  Of course, she’s right again.  But I write this bullshit without a fucking editor.  Everything else in my life is edited by others.  This bullshit is mine.

I like the alliteration of “Cash and Kidney Stones” (or is it illiteration as in illiterate?).   Those hard K’s follows by the soft S’s just roll off my tongue and stick in my ears.  It’s simple, clear, declarative and accurate.

Of course people don’t read past the first sentence, but fuck those people.  They are not going to be to read Sean’s stories anyway and can’t appreciate a well crafted phrase if Shakespeare himself shoved it up their asses with a feather pen.

If we are going to go for emotion, why don’t I steal a Sarah Mclaughlin song, and tell everybody it’s to save Sean’s imaginary one-eyed, 3-legged dog, named lucky.

Sean doesn’t have a dog, but he’s the human version of that old Irish joke.  I could just put a snapchat filter of a dog over his face and no one would know the difference.

While the money is nice, Sean isn’t a charity case.  It’s just to help out a friend.  And I’m not going to set my self-esteem on whether we reach an artificial goal.

America is great in a lot of ways, but deductibles ain’t one of them.  A few bucks from us is a little redress for a system that cares more about cash than people.

I also hate the idea of anyone paying 20-percent juice on a credit card just so they can pee again.   So fuck the credit card companies too.

Ohh, and Merry Christmas.

All that said, if you have a better title for the Go Fund Me — put it in the comments and we’ll see if the Bear approves. To help someone else, I might just bend my “no editing my bullshit” rule.

Jan. 5, 2020

Thanks for everyone who donated.  We raised more than $1400, and I know it made for a better holiday season for Sean and me.

Every once in a while, you have to do something “nice” for someone so you can justify the food you take from others’ mouths.  This was my little bit of rationalization and self-justification.

Thanks to those who visited Sean’s site.  Sometimes to a writer, a few good readers are worth more than gold.