Category: Tennis teams — Pendejos

These assholes got these rants started. It could be a never-ending source of fake anger, sarcasm, and petty feuds. And crustacean jokes — lots of crustacean jokes.

Phallic smile

By Kieran on May 30, 2023 • ( 4 Comments )

I recently took my 15th final farewell trip to the third world racquet club in Tucson. I learned something that may change the way I look at a small part of life — forever. Once you hear this story, it’s going to mess you up too.

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Correcting your kids

By Kieran on April 20, 2023 • ( 4 Comments )

If another adult “disciplines” your kid, the right response is embarassment — you are raising a little fucker who did something wrong. Just apologize and then shut your mouth.

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Bloody Anti-inflammatory

By Kieran on April 6, 2023 • ( 4 Comments )

I can usually have a good night if I can just get my drugs right. It’s not as easy as it sounds.

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Beer over knees

By Kieran on February 7, 2023 • ( 10 Comments )

Sometimes life forces hard choices; some choices are easy.

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Fuck Quiet Tennis

By Kieran on November 3, 2022

I love playing tennis, but I only “tolerate” watching it. I’d love to be a fan, if I could scream obscenities, dress up like an idiot and bring in…

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Had enough

By Kieran on October 31, 2022 • ( 9 Comments )

You know you have had enough of a long weekend party with the Pendejos when it’s Sunday and…

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Head Case

By Kieran on October 20, 2022 • ( 2 Comments )

I was denied summer camp as a child. I skipped the college dorm life. For a few years, I filled the camp/dorm fake nostalgia with Newks tennis camp.

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Dry Fit

By Kieran on August 18, 2022 • ( 2 Comments )

Tennis players are a bunch of cheap bastards, and for 40 years, I fit right in. But then I made the mistake of taking the wife to Indian Wells.

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The Nelson Step

By Kieran on June 16, 2022 • ( 3 Comments )

Look down when you are leaving the bar at the 3rd world racquet club — one of these steps is not like the others. It’s blonde and has a slightly different pattern

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Beach BBQ Bingo

By Kieran on June 2, 2022

One of the reasons people gave me for going to La Jolla was to “barbecue on the beach”. What the fuck?

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Pathetic Hopeless Alcoholic

By Kieran on April 28, 2022 • ( 2 Comments )

Hi, my name is Kieran, and I am a pathetic, hopeless alcoholic — at least according to the wife I am.

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The world’s newest profession

By Kieran on April 26, 2022 • ( 6 Comments )

It’s the end of the world as we know it. Pickleball has not only gone professional, but there are 3 pro leagues. I shit you not. Adults can pick up a paddle and win prize money for hitting a whiffle ball over a net. This has to be […]

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Beer Reviews

By Kieran on March 10, 2022

There’s no fucking free lunch in this world, and that applies to beer too, goddamnit.

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Requiem for a roommate

By Kieran on February 22, 2022 • ( 5 Comments )

I really never cared about the life of birds before I met him. As long as they didn’t poop on my car or swoop down on my head, I hardly noticed they were there. But Alec was quick to point out when two hawks had 4 baby hawks in the big tree on the opposite side of my condo complex in Tucson.

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WTF WTA

By Kieran on January 4, 2022 • ( 5 Comments )

Taking a moral stand in a sports business seems to be a modern oxymoron. Or at least that’s what I wrote and they foolishly published on this website: https://www.eotbsports.com/blogs/news/wta-intervention