Fuck Quiet Tennis
I love playing tennis, but I only “tolerate” watching it. I’d love to be a fan, if I could scream obscenities, dress up like an idiot and bring in…
Had enough
You know you have had enough of a long weekend party with the Pendejos when it’s Sunday and…
Head Case
I was denied summer camp as a child. I skipped the college dorm life. For a few years, I filled the camp/dorm fake nostalgia with Newks tennis camp.
Dry Fit
Tennis players are a bunch of cheap bastards, and for 40 years, I fit right in. But then I made the mistake of taking the wife to Indian Wells.
Fat Biker: Lazy Landscapers
It’s been 30 years of political battles to get cities to build bike lanes. And then the god damn cyclists ride right next to the white line.
The Nelson Step
Look down when you are leaving the bar at the 3rd world racquet club — one of these steps is not like the others. It’s blonde and has a slightly different pattern
Pathetic Hopeless Alcoholic
Hi, my name is Kieran, and I am a pathetic, hopeless alcoholic — at least according to the wife I am.
The world’s newest profession
It’s the end of the world as we know it. Pickleball has not only gone professional, but there are 3 pro leagues. I shit you not. Adults can pick up a paddle and win prize money for hitting a whiffle ball over a net. This has to be […]
My white emergency
I was surfing Youtube and laughing along at this Color of Change video, when I suddenly had my own white emergency.
Beer Reviews
There’s no fucking free lunch in this world, and that applies to beer too, goddamnit.
Requiem for a roommate
I really never cared about the life of birds before I met him. As long as they didn’t poop on my car or swoop down on my head, I hardly noticed they were there. But Alec was quick to point out when two hawks had 4 baby hawks in the big tree on the opposite side of my condo complex in Tucson.
Dear Lewis
I’m sorry you had to cancel your Oct. 29 show in Maricopa Az for your health. But god damn it why did you have to get sick for “my” show.
Tennis or Pickleball – you decide
“You know for someone who moves like you, pickleball is a good option,” they say. Fuck them.
Abandon the Third-World Racquet Club — Updated
After a dozen years of living part time in the Dirty T, right around Christmas, I quit my job — so I’m selling my condo and abandoning the third-world racquet club.
The fucked-up tennis team — STOP
One of the things I like about tennis is the built in “physical distancing.” Even in doubles there’s 4 people in 2808 square feet.
Kieran's Humor 