Tennis teams -- Pendejos

Had enough

You know you have had enough of a long weekend party with the Pendejos when it’s Sunday and…

  • You have a “quiet” breakfast with Geno, and find out he is still annoying.
  • You are glad Joe stayed in his room to just have a “muffin” so you didn’t have to hear about the cornhole match from 3 days ago — again.
  • You give the LJBTC community an Irish goodbye because you just can’t stand to see one more happy, tanned representative of the 1 percent smiling in your face like that.
  • You only ate two meals a day, and “exercised for 2 hours a day” but gained 10 pounds in 4 days
  • Even after two very long pit stops in the bathroom, you are still 4 pounds over where you started.
  • After watching the first two games with Kevin, you are convinced the Phillies are going to lose, but you want to watch the World Series for the first time in a decade anyway.
  • You are still happy that Angry Ed got pegged 4 times with tennis balls on Saturday. Karma bitch, Karma.
  • You never again want to hear how “beautiful” the pickleball courts are in La Jolla.
  • You are over the disappointment and probably feel “it’s for the best” that your one single friend didn’t get laid by the strange lady sitting alone at the bar on Saturday night. Larry claims she was a “pro,” and your single friend still couldn’t close the deal.
  • You are unwilling and unable to even think about having one glass of wine for Sunday dinner.

This is how it started

Drinking a Mai-Tai (with a dark rum “floater”) at the La Jolla Beach and Tennis Club on Wednesday afternoon.

This is how it ended

Barely able to finish my antioxidant fancy water in my living room on Sunday night.
What I learned

Larry, Joe and Geno kept talking about “floaters.” I thought it was a bathroom thing. I remember in college, kids finding out how bad the dorm food was when they realized their shit floated. After a day at home with mom’s cooking, it would finally sink again.

I learned it’s a drinking thing. You pour one more shot of alcohol on top of a margarita or mai-tai or hemingway so it tastes like booze and not like the Shirley Temple mix that Joe likes.

9 replies »

  1. Too funny. A “pro” at the club bar? More likely a woman looking for a man with a substantial bank account, rather than a man with several c notes in his pocket. Doubt Larry qualifies in either category. Truly don’t know how you guys did it. Three beers and I’m gone. Add tequila and I’m gone twice.

  2. K man,
    We have all been there on that Sunday. Wine BTW makes you feel the absolute best and worst. I am equal parts attracted to the single hotties and worried about their designs if they start giving me attention. You make that Mai Tai look temping. I have never liked rum or sugary drinks however. I got to introduce you to my favorite drink -Vodka Press. Vodka ,soda, sprite floater, lime -perfection. Maybe only topped in greatness by my hand made margaritas. If i may digress i made a batch of these delicious margs for a douche bag millennial pool party. They loved them and asked me what the ingredients were and i jokingly said “Tequila, horse blood and mithapristone”. They looked at me like so many cows.
    Aw the quick wit of the young 🙂
    Rock on,
    Butterpants

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