Winter grass, we have our droughts
In a month or so, some people of the Phoenix Valley will cut their Bermuda grass to the nub and plant their rye for winter. Selfish pricks.
Fat Biker: Lazy Landscapers
It’s been 30 years of political battles to get cities to build bike lanes. And then the god damn cyclists ride right next to the white line.
The Nelson Step
Look down when you are leaving the bar at the 3rd world racquet club — one of these steps is not like the others. It’s blonde and has a slightly different pattern
Pathetic Hopeless Alcoholic
Hi, my name is Kieran, and I am a pathetic, hopeless alcoholic — at least according to the wife I am.
Requiem for a roommate
I really never cared about the life of birds before I met him. As long as they didn’t poop on my car or swoop down on my head, I hardly noticed they were there. But Alec was quick to point out when two hawks had 4 baby hawks in the big tree on the opposite side of my condo complex in Tucson.
Share the snake
My “friends” in Tucson are constantly shitting on Phoenix, because it’s so hot. (It’s about 2- 5 degrees warmer). But I can tell you one thing we don’t have — critters.
A History of Tucson
Humans came here about 12,000 years ago. Maybe they were explorers following the mountains and water in search of a better life? More likely they were refugees left to die in this god forsaken summer of hell with no air conditioning.
Sparky or Wilbur
Welcome to Arizona, son. Now pick: UA or ASU.
For me that’s a complicated and changing choice.
Look At This Fucking Guy
Q: What the hell is that bent piece of metal that is sticking over the back left tire?
A: You tell me — that’s what comments are for.
Body Shaming by Kate
We all have a friend or acquaintance who just blurts out the truth even if they are not thinking about it or even trying. Kangaroo-face Gilbson has been trying
My Lying Nazi Just Won't Die
My Lying Nazi Bullshit Diesel’s trip to hell has been delayed — again. I had the appointment to turn in the fucking thing over Labor Day.
One Nazi Wiper
My Lying Nazi Bullshit Diesel is going to Volkswagen hell, one part at a time. The latest part to do the dance of the damned was the front wiper
Snowbird Beggars
It’s beginning to look a lot like Christmas, when the beggars begin to frolic in the streets of Tucson.
Driving under the influence of Tucson
One day a driver in Tucson is going to kill me with kindness — under the wheels of her white sedan with a big fucking Be Kind sticker on the back.
The Dirty T
I’m not sure what it is about Tucson, but it draws out some weird little freaks, and everyone else is OK with that.
KieranHumor.com 